How can I get over a break up? Chapter Two

Falling in love is a process of detoxification, and you thinking about him is replenishing drugs.


According to the speaker in the video how to fix a broken heart I said earlier, broken love is a process of rehabilitating drugs. Whenever you think of a lost lover, you are replenishing drugs. Because he has already left, your brain cannot replenish the drug “connect with him”, so you have to replace it with the good experience between you. However, this process of constant drug replenishment makes it impossible for you to get out of this lost relationship for a long time. So, the first thing you need to do now is to stop “drug use” by applying cessation of thought.


The emotions are actually covered. To give a simple example, you will feel very happy when you do well in the exam and are rewarded with a small red flower, but if you suddenly hear that todays homework has increased by 10 times, you will be immersed in anxiety. Forget the joy of getting good results.


You will be very happy when the stocks you buy have a daily limit, but when you hear that you are fired by the company, you will be completely immersed in the sadness of unemployment. When you go to a big meal with your friends, you will also be immersed in the joy of enjoying the food, and forget the uncomfortable things.


The human brain is incompatible with emotions, one emotion will be covered by another stronger emotion. I said that the thought-stopping technique that I introduced is to use another stronger emotion to cover your miss for him.


First, please prepare a list and write it down in the mobile phone memo. Write down the moments that make you happy in the list, and these moments have a sense of substitution. When you recall these moments, your brain can imagine the happy scene at that time and substitute it. Attention! Everything on this list must have nothing to do with him! It can be something that happened with family, friends, colleagues, but he must not be there!


Whenever you think of him, please shout “Stop!”. Yes, it might be a bit silly to shout out, but you have to do this to be effective. If you feel that it is impossible to shout out, then prepare a plastic bracelet to wear on your wrist. Whenever you think of him, shout “stop” in your heart and change the bracelet from your left hand to your right hand.


After yelling to stop, please open this happy list and substitute yourself into the happy scenes on the list to feel the joy at that time immersively. In this process of substitution and recall, you will naturally stop thinking about him.


I know that this process of stopping missing your ex is short-lived, and you will still think of your ex after you think about the things on the list. This doesn’t matter, it doesn’t mean that the cessation of thought technique has failed, because the cessation of thought is a gradual process!


Maybe you have to think of him 50 times a day, but after using the cessation technique, it will gradually decrease to 40 times, 30 times, 10 times, 5 times, until once or twice a week. The psychological principle of cessation of thought is to replace the good experience you miss with your ex with another stronger happiness. This kind of emotional coverage will make you stop thinking about your ex spontaneously.


After using the cessation technique, your concentration on him will gradually decrease, which will help you to get out of your broken love.

Samuel Whyte

A psychology enthusiast, interested in movies, painting,psychology, hiking, workout etc.

Speaks Chinese and English.

Currently lives in Shanghai, China.

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